Santa Claus is coming to town, so it's time to ask the question: why all the beards? No, seriously. A few years ago, men with beards were fairly rare; perhaps even a bit eccentric. Now they're all over the place. Or should I say all over the face? I understand it's part of the hipster trend, but enough is enough. My male friends are disappearing behind facial foliage. Not only that, but they all look the same: a horde of hairy clones. I feel like the first member of an anti-beard resistance. Using a razor blade is becoming an act of defiance.
As usual, I suspect the media industry is partly to blame. A whole generation of film-makers and influencers grew up watching the films of the 1970s and early 1980s with their dads - a universe populated by bearded macho men. Now they're reliving the moment, so this month we have a lushly bearded Ben Affleck bounding across the screen in Argo, an admittedly exciting thriller set during the Iran hostage crisis in 1979, with period fashions to match. No doubt it will inspire a few more men to abandon the rite of shaving. Some of you may think I should be praising this return to old-fashioned masculinity, but to me it feels a little too much like trend slavery. Gentlemen, it's time to free yourself from fashion. Reclaim your chins.